Samuel Johnson once famously wrote, When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life’
Ngl, I’ve been tired of London plenty of times since relocating as a sparkly-eyed teenager in 2016. These periods of discontent usually came down to one of two things. Money, or my lack thereof. Or the shitty weather.
At the age of 25, I decided I was finished with the city and switched it for Bristol (a decision I almost instantly regretted). As nice as Bris was, it was neither THE city nor MY city. Meaning that only one year later with my tail between my legs, I’m toying with the idea of returning.
So in the spirit of nostalgia, I’m taking a trip down memory lane with an example of my perfect London weekend itinerary. Enjoy!
Friday Afternoon
I’ve finished work and I’m heading straight out to meet my mates at a pub before dinner. We’ll probably be heading somewhere with a suntrap beer garden like Pub on the Park in London Fields or Clissold Park Tavern in Highbury to enjoy an Aperol spritz (or three) while watching the football.1
For fancier occasions, I’m a big fan of Renegade Wine Bar, an urban winery that you’ll find tucked beneath the railway arches in Bethnal Green. To carry on the night, I’d head up the road to Satan’s Whiskers, which isn’t as scary as it sounds. The cocktail bar’s unassuming exterior conceals the weird and wonderful world of taxidermy animals and outlandish drinks inside.
If we’re going out out, it’ll likely be to Oslo by Hackney Central. It’s a club and honestly, I don’t know why it’s the place we end up. It is to Hackney what Infernos is to Clapham. Other spots for late nights include MOTH Club or The Queen Adelaide (rumored to be Rhianna’s fave bar) in Cambridge Heath.
To soak up the booze, I’d head to any kebab shop and order a grilled halloumi wrap with all of the trimmings, pickles, red cabbage maybe even some falafel if I’m feeling fancy, topped with as much chili sauce as poss. It’s medicinal and prevents hangovers.
Saturday Morning
Depending on how late (or early) I’ve stayed up the night before, I like to begin the weekend with a run. I’ve always lived in Tower Hamlets, a borough which I rave about for so many reasons, including its scenic running routes. I love heading down Regents Canal to Limehouse and looping around the shiny dystopia of Canary Wharf before plodding back north to Victoria Park, where loads of social run groups such as Run the Boroughs meet weekly.
The best part about a Saturday shake out? The coffee afterward. I grab one from The Pavilion Cafe with a turmeric bun or almond croissant. Alternatively, just up the road in Victoria Park Village are Popham’s Bakery and Boulangerie Jade, both firm personal favorites.
I’m usually suffice with a baked treat, or cook up a breakfast for myself back at home, but in this fantasy, WE’RE LIVING LARGE BABY. So you’d find me down at Cafe East on Roman Rd. They have the prettiest dishes that combine fruit and fresh juice with your fry up. But be warned, it’s cash only and you might have to queue.
Saturday Afternoon
It’s mooch time. I’m leaving East London and heading central. Probably to meet a friend, visit a different area, pop up, or whatever event my friend has found on TimeOut. As a standard, I’d happily hit up any of the free museums or art galleries dotted across the city. The National Portrait Gallery re-opened and is a London staple, but I also recommend Sir John Soane's Museum, a house full of antiques and collectibles in Holborn or Queer Britain, a celebration of the UK’s LGBTQ+ history located in the trendy Coal Drops Yard in King’s Cross.
For markets, I’m always happy to shop for antique cameras and other shiny bits n bobs at Portobello Road Market over in Notting Hill or browse second-hand vinyls and artwork over at Greenwich Market before strolling through the grand architecture of the riverside Old Royal Naval College.
Saturday Evening
Now for grub. If I fancy carbs, I’m going to see Tom. My old housemate started delivering lasagne to our neighbors around Bow while we were locked down in 2020. E3 and beyond fell in love and he’s since launched Tom’s Pasta over at Hackney Down’s Studio. His menu changes seasonally, but if it’s there, I’m getting the aubergine parmigiana with extra parm (and you should too).
One of the best meals I’ve ever had in London was at Rochelle Canteen in Shoreditch. It’s set within the private gardens of a converted Victorian school building and serves up seasonal dishes that change daily. It’s the kind of food that’s so simple yet so good. I’m still thinking about their radishes.
At the top of my ‘want to go’ list is Speedboat Bar in Soho. This Thai restaurant has me ready to throw in the towel of 6 years of vegetarianism for their tom yum noodles. Google them right now and tell me you wouldn’t too.
Sunday Morning
I’m going to have to balance out all of last night’s food with some low-impact movement. London Fields Lido is a safe option for a few alfresco laps, but if I’m feeling proper brave I’ll head for a dip in the ladies pond at Hamstead Heath. It’s always nippy and you can’t help but think something sinister is lurking deep beneath the murky waters, but boy, it gives you a good old dopamine kick.
Sunday Afternoon
I’m grabbing a massive iced Americano from Fuckoffee and walking around one of three places for the thousandth time, Broadway Market, Bricklane or Spitalfields. If the Sunday scaries are hitting me particularly hard I’ll go and look at the piglets at Hackney City Farm to regulate my nervous system.
A salmon and cream cheese or salt beef beigel from one of the two jewish style bakeries (I’m team white shop iyk, yk) is both economical and delicious. At the markets I rarely ever spend money besides splashing out on the occasional silver ring or £10 cheap sunglasses. I have been known to occasionally brave the crowds at Columbia Road Flower Market for houseplants to spruce up my old shoebox bedroom. But be warned, it’s more sensory overload than a relaxing end-of-week activity.
If I’m feeling in need of some TLC, or if the weather is particularly British, I’ll treat myself to a roast. Finding a good veggie-friendly roast is a challenge and I can confirm that both Clapton Country Club in Hackney and The Lord Tredegar in Bow offer banging ones. Afterward, I’ll retreat away and watch Netflix in an attempt to forget that tomorrow is Monday and I have to once again, respond to emails.
The end! A biggun’ to kickstart by the way but hopefully this gives you a flavour of what’s to come. London recs and destination guides? I got you.
by becca mae x
*FYI - I don’t drink anymore, but if I did, these are the things I’d be doing
Well this has inspired me! Rochelle Canteen here I come! Thanks 💜🙏
This is a great list! I love Popham’s and recently discovered the ponds at Hampstead Heath. What a magical park!